Heirlooms rant

[Sloe Gin]

By and large I think people are entitled to do whatever they want with their own property, but in the case of family items, they should see if anyone else in the family wants them before disposing of them.

A few years ago I was alerted to the forthcoming sale in an auction of a sampler that had been made by a member of my family in 1837.  Someone had searched for her name in GenesReunited and found me.  I guess he was thinking of reuniting the family with a long-lost treasure, but the facts were different.  The samplers of five sisters had been shared among my grandmother and her siblings and passed down through the generations. 

I knew exactly who had put this up for auction, and had they told me - or any of several other cousins - we would gladly have paid them for it, by sealed bids if necessary.  I went to the auction with the backing of my cousins and saw off several underbidders.  I was furious. 

The sampler is now reunited with those of the sisters.  There is some satisfaction in knowing that (because of deductions for commission, insurance, photography etc)  the vendor would have received considerably less than they would have got if they had offered it to other family members. 

[Viktoria]

Jolly well serves ‘em right!
Viktoria.

[Sloe Gin]

What we don't like to think about is how much else has been binned or sold by this person. 

[Carra]

We lost my Dad just over 12 months ago and my sister and I have had many talks about what we are going to do with the 'stuff'. Not just the furniture - although there are two pieces in particular that came from the farm where my Gran was born and grew up.  Both are large pieces that have huge sentimental value to both of us (one was in the home we grew up in, and the other in our Gran's house) and we would love to keep them, but certainly at least one of the pieces is far too big to fit in my small terraced house.  Fortunately we don't have to make a decision on either yet as my Dad's partner continues to live in the house they shared and has lived with both pieces for several decades now.   I'll have to make sure I've moved to a bigger house before we need to do something!  We've also inherited a host of family papers - there's copies of wills from the 19thC, the original lease agreement for the farm my G Grandfather moved to when he married my G Grandmother, and the insurance documents (dated 1895), receipts from the same time for setting up the house, a host of memorial cards and ribbons, letters, books (presents from one sister to another and inscribed as such), photos etc. Its a fascinating treasure trove, and neither of us want to let these things go, but neither of us have children and we will need to do something eventually. We're investigating local history societies and archives in the relevant local area and hoping that at least some of it will find a home where it will be appreciated. 

[ThrelfallYorky]

That's a goodly part of the problem, isn't it? If no descendants, what on earth can you do with things / documents/family history.
TY

[louisa maud]

That is a good idea Carra
I do have a daughter but I believe my son in law won't want our "stuff", so where possible I am sending photographs back to the families concerned and they can d whatever they like with them but not direct blood line,  will make an album.
My parents had what they called  a "china cabinet" neither I or  my brother could house it so eventually it had to go to an antique dealer and I was absolutely amazed at how much it was sold for, plus a chest of drawers that would have gone into a garage, we weren't interested in the money but hopefully the homes they went to they are being enjoyed
I have papers that refer to rents paid in 1900-1920, also receipts for wedding items my parents had at their wedding, all interesting,  I don't want to throw it away, I might have to talk to my daughter and see what she says
LM

[Andrew Tarr]

What we don't like to think about is how much else has been binned or sold by this person. 

The trouble is that this kind of behaviour easily leads to long-term, possibly permanent family rifts. My father-in-law had one sister, who by all accounts was self-willed.  The pair of them agreed to take turns looking after their widowed father, but the arrangement broke down after some years.  Until then their two pairs of daughters, of similar ages, used to visit regularly.  After the breakdown there was no contact for about 60 years, when my wife made enquiries and picked up the threads.

On my side, my father and his two sisters agreed to support their widowed mother financially, until one sister demanded that her 'share' be bought out by my father, with similar results.  As an only child I ended up with effectively one cousin, who lived in Ireland.

There's nowt so queer as folk, as they (allegedly) say oop north ... 

[Viktoria]

As we go “paperless!”  paper artefacts  will become more rare of course but also more interesting ,we don’t any longer sign over stamps for example.

I have seen “ collages “ made of old bills etc but would hesitate to do anything like that with land deeds or such things pertaining to ownership of property etc.
We held our deeds when the mortgage was finished ,big Victorian ones ,a few were replacements but not so interesting.
The local Heritage Society often found them useful to refer to.

I have made albums of funeral notices, with details regarding the family tree etc.
Plastic envelopes in a ring file.
They are open as the folds are breaking down ,well after a hundred years or
more -.
Receipts for parents’ furniture ,cabinet Singer sewing machine etc with a photograph of that before it went to The  Sye Ryder charity shop also dining room suite before that went,sadly none of the bedroom suite which my sister disposed of .
However,my children will not be interested,so what will happen ———
My daughter gives B/ day cards a couple of days then in the bin!
Ruthless .
People don’t have storage space ,stuff is stored as photographs on phones etc.
No answer is there ,all I can say is I have had the pleasure of searching and discovering ,it is all written down so rellies are there ,but after me- no real idea because there is no interest, not even my sister is interested.
Viktoria.

[louisa maud]

I  have  kept  every  funeral order  service for   years  and  years, I  did  look back  on some, interesting to read.

LM