So Harry was the son of Beatrice; hence g/son to Jean/Jane on the 1861 census.  I am gobsmacked to be honest.  This is fantastic.  I didn't try the various spelling of 'Gray'.  Should have done so.  So perhaps little Harry's father must have been a Farquharson.  There was always some suspicion about Harry's birth and no record with the family.  Maybe Harry's dad had a slip between the sheets with Beatrice.
So wonderful; thank you so much. Will update when I receive the marriage cert. in 1894.