Yes we have looked for all of those things. Basically what happened is that my friend did a dna test before christmas which showed up a high match to someone who contacted her. Of course she hadnt started her tree yet so got thown in at the deep end. She knows her birth mother and has her own adoption file in which it states that her mother's father was in merchant navy as engineer and lost at sea the same year as the birth of his child and that mother died in childbirth. (Two adoptions here .... Friend AND her mother were both adopted). DNA contact checked chromosome match and confirmed link on his mothers side and gave a list of family names. So we did a search on all surnames for a death at sea and got a clear match, esp as his middle name and fathers middle name also appear in family tree of contact. The seaman's next of kin was shown as his father (which would be correct as his wife had died in childbirth three months beforehand) and gave an address.
Marriage .... Found a marriage two years previously ..... Only marriage for this name over a two year period ..... He would have been too young to get married before then. Same couple had a boys birth registered to them on same date as my friends birth mother but no sign of a girl. Obviously as we dont know her birth name yet we are searching in the dark. The story about my friends mother being a twin was told to her by her adoptive mother..... But cannot be proved. Of course there is also the possibility that they were not married, but maybe engaged ..... In which case ...... We are back to square one! Is there any way of checking the births and deaths on a particular day?
My friend is actively requesting her birth mothers adoption file but this will take time as her birth mother is still alive. However a new law has come in which allows her to do this especially as she has already met her b mother (who wants no further contact).
So you can see that, although we are fully aware that a paper trail is needed,it is not easy to provide one at present and this has all escalated due to someone contacting about a strong dna match from someone who has only just started!! Its also v difficult for an adopted person to deal with all of this unemotionally ...... Hence the reason I am helping out.
