reasonably well known relative.

[rachelralph]

i decided that the only way i was going to find out the mysteries surrounding some of my ancestors was to start with what i knew and work from there. i knew who my great nanny was and i knew all of her siblings. i also knew most of her siblings spouses. there are lots of mysteries like where did so and so go? why did they change their name? how did they get there etc. my idea was to trace each sibling and follow the line down to each living descendant and then maybe contact them saying "hello we have a shared great great grandfather, do you know anything about...."

the thing is now i have come across as living person who is reasonably well known. ie his name does appear in the papers from time to time and he is definitely well known within his own circle. i didnt realise who he was at first. i found him on fb and sent him a message hoping he would see it and get back to me. i then went away and had a look online for any info about this person (nosy i guess) as soon as i googled his name loads came up about his achievements and his career, plus some newspaper stories about him.

i now feel like a complete wally because when i messaged him i didnt realise this and i just prattled on and on about who i was and who our shared ancestor was and what info i would love to have if he knew it. i didnt for one minute think he was possibly who he is. now i dont know whether to message him again telling him im not some freak who randomly messages people. i dont want him to think im a stalker or anything haha.

so what should i do?

[lizdb]

Wait and see if he responds , just the same as you would if you hadn't found he was "famous".

If your research thus far that you have shared with him is sound, and if he has any interest in pursuing it, then the fact that he is "famous" should make no difference at all to this, should it?

If, after a while (and, like any of us he may of course be a busy man) , you get no response then you will need to think if or how you will follow it up - the same as if you didn't get a response but had not discovered his "fame".

[Marmalady]

Agree with Liz

Just wait and see if he responds

If he is interested in your shared ancestry, he will reply, if he isn't, he won't

His fame has nothing to do with your relationship -- and for all you know he might be thrilled receiving a communication that treats him just like any other "normal" person!

[clairec666]

He probably hasn't seen your message to be honest, it'll get lost amongst the other "wallies" messaging him for other reasons!

Maybe he's seen your message, and isn't interested in genealogy, in which case, more fool him. He doesn't know what he's missing

Hopefully some of the other relatives you've found will be able to help you instead.

[rachelralph]

i hadnt really thought of it like this. i was so caught up in "Blimey hes famous" that i hadnt really stopped to think that actually hes just human too. daft teenage moment there i guess 

sadly there is no one left to answer any questions. well actually there might be but if there is i cant find them seeing as a few of the gentleman dissappered in the 1950's. they most likely have new lives with new children somehwere but i dont think i will ever find them.

hopefully this person will get back to me.

[clairec666]

There's always a chance he'll sign up for Who Do You Think You Are.... then all your questions may be answered!

[StevieSteve]

I've got a similar problem in that one of my relatives is quite high up in the academic world and the only contact address I've seen is one at the University. I've started writing a mail but have come to the conclusion that there's too fine a line between legitimate family history research and stalking when it comes to living relatives

Here's my draft:

Dear Prof X, hope you don't mind me using your work email

My name's StevieSteve and I'm researching our family tree. I'm actually your 2nd cousin once removed. It may sound remote but in fact my Mum went to your 21st birthday party though she didn't enjoy it. Or like you very much, to be honest.

I wonder if it would be possible to meet up as I'd really like some insight into your side of the family.

I see your daughter is back to using her maiden name. Didn't the marriage work out or is there another reason?

Looks like your granddaughter is having fun at university according to her facebook page! You must be very proud. Well, most of the time, anyway :-)

Look forward to hearing from you


Think it might need a tweak or two.

[Mike in Cumbria]

I've got a similar problem in that one of my relatives is quite high up in the academic world and the only contact address I've seen is one at the University. I've started writing a mail but have come to the conclusion that there's too fine a line between legitimate family history research and stalking when it comes to living relatives

Here's my draft:

Dear Prof X, hope you don't mind me using your work email

My name's StevieSteve and I'm researching our family tree. I'm actually your 2nd cousin once removed. It may sound remote but in fact my Mum went to your 21st birthday party though she didn't enjoy it. Or like you very much, to be honest.

I wonder if it would be possible to meet up as I'd really like some insight into your side of the family.

I see your daughter is back to using her maiden name. Didn't the marriage work out or is there another reason?

Looks like your granddaughter is having fun at university according to her facebook page! You must be very proud. Well, most of the time, anyway :-)

Look forward to hearing from you


Think it might need a tweak or two.

That should work.

[davidft]

My name's StevieSteve and I'm researching our family tree. I'm actually your 2nd cousin once removed. It may sound remote but in fact my Mum went to your 21st birthday party though she didn't enjoy it. Or like you very much, to be honest.

I wonder if it would be possible to meet up as I'd really like some insight into your side of the family.

I see your daughter is back to using her maiden name. Didn't the marriage work out or is there another reason?

Looks like your granddaughter is having fun at university according to her facebook page! You must be very proud. Well, most of the time, anyway :-)


Think it might need a tweak or two.

I would be absolutely horrified if i got a message along those lines. Its very rude and doesn't convey a very good impression of you in my opinion.

As to a tweak I would suggest just bin it and if you really want to contact the person start again.