Thank you so much, for all the help that you have given me - it is fantastic.
I am following Martin and Sarah Bourke's third child, second son, Charles, who is my grandfather.  Although the rest of the family hold great interest to me too;  I would love to find some cousins!
Re Frances/Fanny Butterick's grave;  I have been down to the Ashburton Cemetery to check it out, and find that Frances is buried with her husband, Henry, as one would expect, and not with the Coopers;  they are in the next door grave.  Clearly, the cemetery records have it incorrectly - so I will let them know.
Cheers,  Pam