Found out some bad things about Hubby's ancestors

[Graham47]

If you have concerns perhaps you should draw the line at those in living memory, not unlike being unable to go beyond the 1911 census here in the UK? I have found out so much over the past year both from my own research and some splendid help from chat members here. One discovery was to find out that my own paternal surname actually came from a 4th great grandmother who had a child out of wedlock. Interesting? your bet, a secret to be kept? Well no not really, unlike the discovery that a close and still living family member bashed his lady on the head with a hammer and got more than a few years inside for manslaughter - no wonder we'd not heard from him for a while! 

[stevew101]

I discovered that one of my lines, who were agricultural workers, got themselves into quite a few scrapes with the law.  On a number of occasions they were involved in problems with drink, and for stealing chickens.  It culminated in one member of the family stealing a loaf of bread, which ended with him being sentenced to death.  The sentence was commuted to 14 years transportation to Australia.  After a number of months waiting on the hulks at Woolwich, he departed for Australia onboard the Letitia.  En-route to the new land, the sailors onboard the ship were involved in a mutiny.  Once he arrives in his new land, he seems to have led quite a full life.  He entered and won ploughing competitions, although was still brought before the Courts for drunken behaviour.  One night when returning home from a drink in the local town, he had to cross the river Hunter in a boat.  Sadly he fell out and drowned.

I found his life and that of his family very interesting.  It also made me take note how hard life was for our ancestors.  The fear of being sentenced to death for stealing a loaf of bread in order to feed your family.  He was obviously a hard worker as noted in the newspaper reports of the ploughing competitions. Like many of his day, he was simply very poor and trying to survive. 

The one thing that can be said - He lived a very full and interesting life.

[joboy]

It is amazing when you study the history of good people who were transported for insignificant crimes.
Transportation was an easy means of populating a colony.
There is one instance in my tree where a young newly married man with two young children in Norwich was caught with stolen copper and transported in 1834.
He was a whitesmith by trade and when he got his 'Ticket of Leave' he took on blacksmithing in Parramatta (which is where I am now) and was the first to be so in that area and was greatly respected there.
He took on a common law wife (1841 a daughter of a convict) and when he died (1863) he left all he had to her and his reference in his will was ' with whom I now cohabit' .......... and she died September 1912 aged 89.
They had a number of children without which I would not be here.
Joe

[Leanne.]

I think every family has at lease one bad seed along the line some where whether they know about it or not.
I have found quite a few articles about my ancestors, when reading old newspapers I feel that local papers were just local gossip lol they reported everything, including names no privacy laws back then.

One of my ancestors was in the papers quite a bit cause she was seeking maintenance for a child, they posted the whole story about how she met the father of child, when and where and how the child was conceived. They weren't married, the guy promised her marriage and gave her some jewellery so she "gave in to him"  but he never married her and didn't stay with her.

She was probably the talk of the town back then, and maybe bought some shame on her family.
I think it's helpful to have a few bad seeds because it brings up more documents and records about them.


I have found something from my partners family (direct line) about 7 generations ago, 1st cousins married. I haven't told my partner and I probably won't. I don't think it's something he needs to know. It doesn't affect him now but I know that if I told him he would worry about it.

[iluleah]

You or your husband are not responsible for what your respective ancestors did or didn't do. We are all human and we all make mistakes.
As family historians we are also nosey and dredge up things from the past about our ancesors lives that even they may have been ashamed of and would prefer to be left alone and forgotten.

No one would help me when I began, my mother said " let sleeping dogs lie" my grandmother confused me when I asked the same question a few weeks apart and gave me conflicting information, so I knew there was more to know...and there was.

30 Years of researching and it is only in the last couple of years my mother has shown any interest in my  FH research, 30 years of my silence about what I might have  found got the better of her and I caught secretly her looking at my FH folder, saying nothing I let her read it and she sighed and said " interesting" I smiled, she is satisfied I found nothing. However the file she looked at is my  bare basic info, I found her secret within weeks of starting, sorted out the conflicting information from my grandmother and uncovered many things within the first two years of researching, I have known for 28 plus years but I see no point in upsetting them about things they wish to 'keep secret' and other things they don't even know about that would possibly make hair curl, I am the nosey one!

[Graham47]

You make some interesting points.

My own mother may she be resting in peace used to say something similar along the lines of not being able to put the clock back and to which my own reply was no, but we can at least put it right. What I have learned is that we have been told as children by our parents is not always correct and misleading at best having been told in my own case on more than one occasion that my maternal grandmother was "adopted" only to find out much later that this line came down from travelers and hawkers ending up in just about one of the worst areas of my home town as was.

I also keep two records of family history. One in the public domain as it were, and one kept private and for the eyes of my own immediate family. This is not so much as hiding away facts (that can be easily found these day) but matters of opinion, experiences and family stories I have been able to attach to various levels of my research.

No dirty washing in public? I suppose 

[Leanne.]

I feel that all secrets eventually come out, well most of them. IMO if the person is no longer living then why is it such a big deal to keep the secret hidden away.

I know in some cases the secret might affect living people, but I think if there was a secret that might affect me I would want to know about it.

[Graham47]

Unfortunately true and also uncomfortable when such 'secrets' are divulged by somebody outside of the family. It leaves a sour taste to learn that somebody else has known for years what you should have been told first. I know, it happened to me when I was told I had other full siblings, and several half siblings from previous marriages of both my parents none of which I knew about. Should my parents have told me? I think they should have, especially as both families were within spitting distance and besides, just imagine the consequence of bringing home a sister or brother as your new partner!
   

[Leanne.]

Yes I agree, things like that should always be told. Especially if the unknown siblings are all living close to each other and especially once they get to dating age.