How can I find a relative?

[longlostbro20]

I can't find any trace that my brother is still alive. I know his birth name first and last. My dad died when he was not even 1 and when I was still in the womb. So my mother has seen him but only once. My father wasn't married to either of our mothers. And his family only saw his son once as far as I know. No one on that side can even help me out on my brother's name. And paternity wasn't established for either of us. I look a lot like my father's side though. No one questions that I'm his daughter. But my mom always questioned saying that my brother may have or may not have been someone else's son because he didn't look like him at all when he was a kid. Was more like his mom. Either way, I just wanted to get in contact with and I've tried searching for him but his name always comes up with no such person. When my dad died, my brother went to the funeral. I went as an embryo. I wasn't named on the obituary but he was. So I saw his first and last name. I'm 19 now. He'd be about 20 maybe 21 now. I wish I just knew what became of him. I'm wondering what can I do to find out more about him? Because all I have now is a name on an obituary. My mom and a few others saying what they remember the day they saw him at the funeral and that's it. It kind of bothers me when people ask if I have brothers or sisters and I say yes I do but I have nothing to say about him besides that his name age and a vague description. I don't even know his mom's first name. How can I find him with such limited information is it possible?

[Spidermonkey]

As you know Rootschat is about finding ancestors rather than living relatives, however some ideas:

Is your brother's mother's name uncommon?  Can you find a marriage for her?  Brother might have taken on step-father's surname.

Have you tried facebook - I'd be really surprised if a 21 yr old didn't have a FB profile!

electoral rolls - the recent ones are available on line (this will only be relevant if you are in the UK)

Good luck x

[iluleah]

It is a long shot..........
Have you looked on the freebmd index to see if you can find his birth registration details, that at least could give you what quarter and area he was registered in, although I doubt you could obtain his birth cert, if you could find that and apply for family history purposes maybe, by stating on that on the form and your relationship as sister. If so that would give you his mothers name,also  if your father was mentioned or not and with her name you could then look to see if she married and to who on the freebmd indexes.

The other thing you can do which has already been mentioned by Spidermonkey
is social media, such as FB, you could try people search websites and phone/electoral rolls, there are several on here which may help you http://familytimeline.webs.com/adoptionlivingrelations.htm .

Also the Salvation Army run a  'Family Tracing Service' maybe they could help

[dawnsh]

Hi longlostbro20

you haven't updated your profile so we dont know where in the world you are but your use of the word 'Mom' infers you aren't in the UK.

Regardless of that, this still isn't a forum for finding living relatives so I would suggest you have a look at the various overseas resource pages here to see if you can find other sources of information.

Generally though, you should be looking for his birth, he might still be a bit young but a marriage and ultimately a death.

He may also have changed his name so finding him may be particularly difficult.

Dawn

[longlostbro20]

As you know Rootschat is about finding ancestors rather than living relatives, however some ideas:

Is your brother's mother's name uncommon?  Can you find a marriage for her?  Brother might have taken on step-father's surname.

Have you tried facebook - I'd be really surprised if a 21 yr old didn't have a FB profile!

electoral rolls - the recent ones are available on line (this will only be relevant if you are in the UK)

Good luck x

I'm in the USA. I've tried facebook. No such searches exist.
Both my mom and I have tried this avenue to find him.. Nothing

[carol8353]

It is a long shot..........
Have you looked on the freebmd index to see if you can find his birth registration details, that at least could give you what quarter and area he was registered in, although I doubt you could obtain his birth cert, if you could find that and apply for family history purposes maybe, by stating on that on the form and your relationship as sister.

FreeBMD is only really complete up to the mids 1960's.I'd be very surprised if you found any births from the 1990's on there yet.

Maybe you could look into your dad's family,did he have any siblings,are his parents still alive?
Do you have an address that he was living at when he died? There might be some clues in the electoral rolls at that address.

All very difficult ,as Dawn says, when Rootschat is really meant to help with finding ancestors,and not living relatives.

Carol

[carol8353]

Are these people you mention all born in the UK or USA?

If the USA then the situation will be different and you'll need advice from people on the correct board.

Carol

[dawnsh]

Hi Carol

see the bottom of reply #4

I'll move the topic but I don't think there is anything specific that can be posted due to the policies here to protect living people.

Dawn

[shellyesq]

Have you checked www.switchboard.com or www.whitepages.com?  If you know his mother's maiden name, have you tried his first name + her surname?  If you know where he grew up, try to see if he is in a high school yearbook for that area.  Some yearbooks are online, or a local library might have it in their catalog and be willing to do a look-up for you. 

If you know what state he was born in/lived in, we might be able to point you to more specific sources.