People preferring their middle name, and then changing their middle name to be

[Billyblue]

My Grandad was John Richard, but known all his life as Dick. His daughter (my Aunt) was Doris Margaret but known all her life as Margaret. Like an earlier posting, it wasn't until her funeral that I knew that her real name was Doris.

but a second name is a real name!
At least it is if you're either christened or registered with it!
eadaoin

Precisely, Eadaoin!

I have always been known by my second name.  Only officialdom and people who don't know me call me by my first name which I hate (for various reasons).   I get really p****ed off when people say "Oh is xxx your real name?"

Most of the females in my dad's family were known by their second name.
My mum was known by her second name, which was the name her mother picked for her, but the priest who baptised her insisted on putting a saint's name first!  It was an obscure saint called Balbina so we can understand why she wasn't known by that one, but by Pearl which was her parents' choice.

Dawn M

[andrewalston]

One place I worked had the computer system login names of the form firstname-surname, where firstname had to be the official firstname. Only if there was a clash were variations allowed.

The chap responsible for the policy only realised what he had done when he was forced to type "Valentine-", which he hated and never used.

[Caz1960]

A great aunt of mine, born Honor Ann Jane, married as Ann Jane, emigrated as Jane, was sent a copy of her obituary notice that someone kindly found for me, she died as Anna .......... neither wonder we all go gray haired at an early age doing our family history 

[Lisajj]

In my husbands family the men on his mothers side have all been called George Frederick.  So one generation was known as Fred and the other as George.  On his fathers side, all of the children were known by their second names! Confusing when you are asking about people. Me: "what can you tell me about Ann?", Father in Law: "oh I didn't have an aunt Ann, I had an aunt Jane", Me:"yes, Ann's first name was Jane" Father in Law: "was it?  I don't think so, I didn't have an aunt Jane"....... Me:"what about James?" Father in Law: "I don't know a James" Me: "your uncle, James Richard" Father in Law "I had an uncle Dick"  Me: "well Dick is short for Richard" Father in law: "Is it?  I don't remember anyone called James"......even showing him the census info, he still didn't get it!  The only one out of all of his aunts and uncles that was called by his first name was my father in laws father!

[smuller73]

I remember wondering why the post to my Gran was always addressed to E Collins when her name was Theresa until I came to find out that Theresa was her 3rd name her full name was Elizabeth Catherine Theresa. Her sister was always known as Margaret and it was only when she died that I found out her full name was Mary Margaret. That made more sense though as she was named after her mother, so it would have got a bit confusing with 2 Mary's in the house. Quite a lot of my family, particularly the Mary's were known my their middle name's at one time or another.

[Jeuel]

If I can't find someone using their first name, I try their middle name.  The only puzzle for me is why the parents don't just reverse the names in the first place.

My Dad was one of 4 brothers and the only one who was known by his first name, although confusingly his brother Harry Samuel was called Harry by his wife and Sam by everyone else.  Their eldest child was named Harry but called something else all his life and he only found out he was called Harry was when he got his birth cert to apply for a passport!  Similarly, my Uncle George was really called Jeuel George and the eldest uncle, Jabez John Thomas was called Jim.  Work that out!

[ScouseBoy]

I went to a boys Grammar school in the 1960s.   If I remember correctly  boys were addressed by their surnames,

In my class there were two Hughes's    so I was known by my initials,   which was better than being addressed by my surname, I think.