I would love to know why Ruby Maidment died in the UK and William Cuthbertson in San Francisco.
Well, it's four years since this questions was posted, but my brother emailed me yesterday and said "you wouldn't believe what comes up when you google "William Reid Dougal Cuthbertson" (our grandfather) and I found this thread!
I know EXACTLY why William Cuthbertson died in San Francisco (Marin County, actually, a little north of SF, and I was with him in hospital three days before his death) while his (ex) wife died in Sussex. And that's the key - they were separated for many many years, during most of which he was with our grandmother, Dorothea Hawke, a WWI widow. They had one child together, our mother, who was indeed born out of wedlock.
William (who everyone called "Cuth" but who his four grandchildren called "Popsie") and Ruby were finally able to get a no-fault divorce after WWII, by which time Cuth and Dorothy ("Dickie" to all) were living in California, and, I think, had at least one grandchild. Cuth and Dickie were immediately married, and Cuth formally adopted my mother.
But the really strange part of this story is that they did not tell her anything - not until 1975, when, at age 24, I traveled to the UK and was scheduled to meet some distant family relations. However, I came back to the US as clueless as when I left, so she was told to keep her mouth shut, even though she wanted to tell the world that Cuth was her real father (she'd been told her father had died, but her mother was widowed a couple of years before that would have been possible).
So we weren't allowed to know the truth about our real grandfather until both of them were gone, when he died in 1979. My father (who was divorced from our mother before 1975) said he always had his suspicions, looking at the two of them, but the story was so entrenched, he never said a thing.
By the way, he was an absolutely lovely person, the most gracious man you could ever hope to meet. It was an honor to have him in our lives for as many years as we did.
I hope someone reads this! I'll try to find the profile setup where I will get notified if anyone responds, or maybe there's a messaging system in this site.
Cheers,
Jan from Seattle, WA - USA
