How cross would you be, or am I over reacting?

[danuslave]

After reading this and other discussions on RootsChat, I have decided that the tree I have on Ancestry will only contain birth, marriage, death and census information that is already in the public domain, plus the sources.

It is very easy to build the tree this way and I can then download it as a gedcom file to import into the software on my pc, where I keep all the anecdotal details.

If anyone wants to 'steal' the information on Ancestry, rather than doing the work themselves, I'm really not bothered!

By doing this I have already made contact with a (previously unknown) first cousin once removed, who kindly sent me some photo scans.

As has already been mentioned on RootsChat, I would never accept anything from someone else's tree without checking it out myself!

But we should all take Lydart's comment

we need to remember when we press the 'enter' key ... its anyone's information ! 

to heart.

If we don't want other people to have the information, don't put it on the web 

Linda

[Floss]

I have my tree on Ancestry but its private and people wishing to view it have to contact me and so far have had no problem with it.
On another note, I can't understand why some people just want as many names as possible in their tree

Fiona

[Lydart]

I've got two trees (both private !)

One is the real one ... with everything proven with documentation ..

... the other (and thank goodness its private !)  is my hyperthetical tree which extends the real one with all sorts of possibles ... which I cant prove but might, just might, be true and proveable one day !   That one includes Catherine Howard (she of the lost head), various French/Norse noblemen back to the 6th century ( ! ), and even William the Conqueror ... and no, I'm not sharing it with anyone !   We all need a bit of fantasy, as long as we remember it is fantasy !    Which, sadly, is what a lot of people with 50,000 names on their trees have ... just fantasy !!

(Just occasional, very rarely, a little bit of the hyperthetical one gets moved to the real one )

[Preraphaelite]

Beware of ignoring people!  A couple of years ago we had a bit of a run of bad luck, owing to illness and a family bereavement.  We also had some problems with our home computer at the time and couldn't get it fixed straight away, what with everything else going on, so I was unable to get online for a few weeks.  When I eventually was able to check through all my emails, I found several from a particular older "gentleman" who had tried to contact me about a name I had on my GR tree.  The emails had started off pleasantly enough but, as he had not received his anticipated reply, each subsequent email became increasingly irate. The final one I read informed me that I was an extremely rude and horrible individual (or something to that effect)!

I really didn't know what to do - I was so shocked, and not really in the mood for any confrontation at the time. I figured that after his final outburst he would just leave me alone, so I did nothing.  A couple of weeks later I went to check my emails one day and discovered that this man had started a new tactic of flaming my inbox with messages!  This continued for a few days wth up to 70 emails a day from him, until I snapped and completely removed my tree and account with GR. I've not dared to use the site again! 

I suppose I really should have reported him.  I did however speak to a cousin and fellow genealogist about it.  She had also been in contact with this man and thought he seemed very pleasant and helpful (!), but my opinion is that this man is clearly a complete fruitloop! 

[RRYFS]

I'm fairly recent to all this and apologise if I sometimes miss normal conventions - and don't get answers as a result! I started with 2 inherited paper trees from my father's and my wife's father's families which made for a good start. I keep my tree on GR and have contacted a number of others either by following up Hot Matches, picking up on individual Tree Links, or by replying to messages. I have assumed everyone was basically on the same mission as me (even the 2 contacts with over 30,000 names in their tree) and have opened my tree where the match was obvious. On one of the "big" trees, I couldn't find how the relatives linked in as there seemed to be no join at top or bottom, but it wasn't an issue. I have made a couple of good contacts where we have been able to collaborate to make new progress and my tree now exceeds 500 names.
When I started I found FindMyPast and after a spell of payg eventually opted for a subscription. I realise that more info is available on Ancestry, but I'm certainly not paying for 2 lots, and as one of my contacts has an Ancestry sub, we can work together.
My gripe is that I got a message from someone who appears on my Hot Matches with several names in common who claimed to have a picture of my wife's GG (or GGG depending which line you follow) grandparents and asked for an e-mail to provide further details and access. It seemed genuine and she claimed the relatives as her GGG grandparents so I replied with a chatty e-mail describing progress and the interesting research we were currently undertaking. The reply I got I would almost describe as Ancestry spam, seemingly designed to encourage me to take up the free trial or subscribe. There was no personalisation and it really p...ed me off, especially as she didn't even open her GR tree to me. Do others have experience of this? Is it an Ancestry tactic, or am I reading more into an unfortunately worded e-mail than was intended?

[nameless]

I was recently contacted by a distant relative through GR.  Having proved we were related we accessed each other's trees.  This was the first time he had put anything online and he had uploaded his own file.  I noticed that there was a great deal of personal information including his life history and current address.  Also the details of his daughter and young grandchildren were entered.  I emailed him and advised him to remove this information.  I also became concerned that he might accidentally pass on my information and so I decided to remove my tree from GR.  I have not reinstated my tree.  The chap decided to remove everything from GR and cancelled his subscription.  Unfortunately he had allowed a man to access his tree and that man copied all the personal information into his own tree.  I have emailed the second man asking him to remove the information but he has not replied.  They had not exchanged personal emails and so my relative cannot contact him.  I presume the only thing he can do is contact the site.

I cannot understand how people can enter another's personal details without asking.  It would never occur to me.

[NadT]

Like most people on here I keep a tree on Genes and Ancestry, but I do not keep any detail on them, just names, year and place of birth.  I have had made friends, some on the otehr side of the world, and obtained some useful information from contacts on both sites, with joint efforts in some areas helping clear up the grey areas BUT all the detail is kept on my own software on my home PC.  I did initially start to keep some detail (nothing too personal, DOBs for deceased ancestors) but having had some issues with people taking details from my tree without asking (including details of living relatives) I decided the safest thing was to hide living relatives on both sites and only put the bare minimum of information for everyone else.  One person who had about 300 names in their tree did actually ask if they could copy all the details of all my living relatives onto their tree even though their link was via a marriage 3 generations back, so not very close at all.  I asked them not to copy details of living relatives and  they weren't too happy and sent me a very sharp email saying that in that case I should remove any reference to their ancestor from my tree ( a member of my direct paternal line married their ancestor) - it was at that point I made the decision to change to change the way i post my info on the net.  That person now has over two thousand names in their tree!

Anyway, at least now, through email contact I can determine how genuine someone is, and how close their link is, and ultimately how much or little information I share.

I like everyone else am amazed at people who name collect - I don't understand what it achieves.  My aim is to learn about my ancestors lives, their history, which is why i only have some 700 names in my tree at the moment.  I could have thousands if I simply wanted to list every single person who could possibly be related, but what is the point because then that's all they'd be - just names.

[Supergran!]

I had the same problem from GR to Anc & I was livid & couldn't
send a message to the person concerned, obviousley on GR, but I got a certain amount of satisfaction when I found out that I had followed completely the wrong line in my Carter famil- generations in fact (pain in the bot for me!) but it has upset her tree as well !!

[snackdahl]

I'm quite lucky in the fact that I found this site before I had given anyone access to my rather meagre tree (been at this for 3 months and only have 180 genuine names so far) but I would have shared these without hesitation believing everyone to be as honest as I would be with their tree.

I've had really nice, genuine people and we have shared knowledge each way, but then again I have had the "can I have access to your tree" messages without anything to verify that we actually share common ancestors. The last message I got was actually the wrong person totally and when I replied to tell them, I got a message back saying "but can I still have access to your tree?"

The mind boggles