Author Topic: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.  (Read 32394 times)

Offline Nick29

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #135 on: Wednesday 19 November 08 08:15 GMT (UK) »
I find it strange that a persons name (no other personal details) can be "against the rules". Your name is in the public domain in many places.

Speaking as someone who has been a victim of identity theft, I can tell you that when it happens to you, it can make you paranoid about it.

You didn't make it clear whether you had posted someone's name in isolation, or whether you had placed their name in a tree.  If it was the latter, I can understand their concern, because although it may have only been a name posted, it would have been linked to a mother and a father's name, and one of the questions asked as part of security checks with many banks and credit card companies is "Mother's maiden name".  Fraudsters operate by seeking out snippets of facts about people from various places, and putting them all together, so it's not a good idea to put details of living people on sites where anyone can look them up.
RIP 1949-10th January 2013

Best Wishes,  Nick.

Census information Crown Copyright, from www.nationalarchives.gov.uk

Offline Tricia_2

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #136 on: Wednesday 19 November 08 08:57 GMT (UK) »
I have to agree with you, Nick29.

Many people here on Rootschat are very wary about putting very much at all on GenesReunited.

I have my tree on there, but no living people, except me. And I tend not to put deceased people on there, if they have living offspring, unless they too have added them, because that can cause problems, as well. My father is no longer alive, but he is on there as 'male relative'.

A relative of my friend put the details of her family on, without permission ~ I found them and she was really annoyed. I would have been, too.
Worcs / Glos: Neal Neale Jeynes Jeens Geans Harris Roper Ropier Colley Dyer Heeks Bayzand Hampton Bishop Cole Elton Littlehales McGowan
Glamorgam: Hampton Thornton Svombo Swambo Swanbo Keefe O Keefe Shanahan Shannon Doyle Maldoon Muldoon Davies Llewellyn Jones
Birmingham: Neale Sarjant Cole Hiley Berridge Tirebuck

Offline Guy Etchells

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #137 on: Wednesday 19 November 08 17:27 GMT (UK) »
I find it strange that a persons name (no other personal details) can be "against the rules". Your name is in the public domain in many places.

Speaking as someone who has been a victim of identity theft, I can tell you that when it happens to you, it can make you paranoid about it.

You didn't make it clear whether you had posted someone's name in isolation, or whether you had placed their name in a tree.  If it was the latter, I can understand their concern, because although it may have only been a name posted, it would have been linked to a mother and a father's name, and one of the questions asked as part of security checks with many banks and credit card companies is "Mother's maiden name".  Fraudsters operate by seeking out snippets of facts about people from various places, and putting them all together, so it's not a good idea to put details of living people on sites where anyone can look them up.

Yes, banks ask that question but only the naive would actually answer with a name.

When answering any security question always use a random mixture of numbers letters and symbols. Never use any word or name unless you want to destroy any element of security afforded.
Cheers
Guy
http://anguline.co.uk/Framland/index.htm   The site that gives you facts not promises!
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As we have gained from the past, we owe the future a debt, which we pay by sharing today.

Offline Nick29

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #138 on: Thursday 20 November 08 11:34 GMT (UK) »
Yes, banks ask that question but only the naive would actually answer with a name.

Well Guy, when I had my identity stolen, it wasn't a bank at fault, it was a credit card issuer - in fact the second largest CC issuer in the world - Mastercard.

The only naivity on my part was in assuming that no-one could be so stupid that they would allow a password to be changed during an online transaction on the production of someone's DOB and mother's maiden name !  Since the CC company already had these details on the CC application form, I didn't even have to give it to them.  Visa have a very similar system.  The actual bank that issued the card agreed that the system is about as secure as the bank of toytown, but the system is set up by Mastercard USA who are not worried about the security hole, because we are paying for it in our bank charges.

The onus of establishing good security is on our banks, not us, but I don't see the point of encouraging fraudsters by leaving my personal details all over the internet (although completely avoiding that is extremely difficult, if not impossible).

RIP 1949-10th January 2013

Best Wishes,  Nick.

Census information Crown Copyright, from www.nationalarchives.gov.uk


Offline Tricia_2

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #139 on: Thursday 20 November 08 14:12 GMT (UK) »
.... I don't see the point of encouraging fraudsters by leaving my personal details all over the internet (although completely avoiding that is extremely difficult, if not impossible).
Especially if you are researching the family history.
Worcs / Glos: Neal Neale Jeynes Jeens Geans Harris Roper Ropier Colley Dyer Heeks Bayzand Hampton Bishop Cole Elton Littlehales McGowan
Glamorgam: Hampton Thornton Svombo Swambo Swanbo Keefe O Keefe Shanahan Shannon Doyle Maldoon Muldoon Davies Llewellyn Jones
Birmingham: Neale Sarjant Cole Hiley Berridge Tirebuck

Offline Guy Etchells

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #140 on: Thursday 20 November 08 21:46 GMT (UK) »

Well Guy, when I had my identity stolen, it wasn't a bank at fault, it was a credit card issuer - in fact the second largest CC issuer in the world - Mastercard.

The only naivity on my part was in assuming that no-one could be so stupid that they would allow a password to be changed during an online transaction on the production of someone's DOB and mother's maiden name !  Since the CC company already had these details on the CC application form, I didn't even have to give it to them.  Visa have a very similar system.  The actual bank that issued the card agreed that the system is about as secure as the bank of toytown, but the system is set up by Mastercard USA who are not worried about the security hole, because we are paying for it in our bank charges.

The onus of establishing good security is on our banks, not us, but I don't see the point of encouraging fraudsters by leaving my personal details all over the internet (although completely avoiding that is extremely difficult, if not impossible).



The answer is very simple sue them.
The banking industry have known since the early 1970s that using names etc not only provides no security at all but in fact lulls the naive into a false sense of security.
To use any such system is negligent and the bank or Credit Card company can be made to pay.
Cheers
Guy
http://anguline.co.uk/Framland/index.htm   The site that gives you facts not promises!
http://burial-inscriptions.co.uk Tombstones & Monumental Inscriptions.

As we have gained from the past, we owe the future a debt, which we pay by sharing today.

Offline matt94

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #141 on: Friday 10 April 09 22:11 BST (UK) »
Hi,

I have gone throught something a bit like yours, Guy; my aunt will not talk to me because I found out about my grandfather's affair and she said no-one need no. To be honest, I wasn't going to shout about it to anyone. Also, my grandfather and grandmother had a child that until about 6 months ago, I knew nothing of. She was called Gillian and she was delivered with some sort of brain abnormality in the sixties, and no one will have anything to do with her. She is actually still alive but they do not know that   :(

Unless your sister has some family reason like mine, I think she should accept that you are doing what is right for you, although you might have to work around her wishes.

Matt
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Offline LizzieW

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #142 on: Saturday 11 April 09 12:34 BST (UK) »
Matt

I think it's a generational thing.  Although my mother told me about her uncle going  into a mental asylum in the early 1900s, that is the only family "scandal" she spoke about.  For instance, I didn't know an aunt had got divorced, I was just told her husband was working away.  Even divorce was thought to be too scandalous to speak about in the 1940s. Yet my brother who wasn't born until 12 years after me was told when he was a child and he was the one who told me, when I was already an adult!  And don't get me started on illegitimate babies. ::)

Nowadays, most people couldn't care less about what happens in their families and what anyone thinks about them - murder and other awful crimes probably excepted.

Lizzie

Offline Tricia_2

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Re: My sister doesn`t want me to do the family history.
« Reply #143 on: Saturday 11 April 09 14:16 BST (UK) »
I agree with you Lizzie. Things that upset my grandparents & even parents don't bother anyone today.

Even pregnancies within marriage were whispered about ~ those outside of wedlock were not even thought about :( :)

Worcs / Glos: Neal Neale Jeynes Jeens Geans Harris Roper Ropier Colley Dyer Heeks Bayzand Hampton Bishop Cole Elton Littlehales McGowan
Glamorgam: Hampton Thornton Svombo Swambo Swanbo Keefe O Keefe Shanahan Shannon Doyle Maldoon Muldoon Davies Llewellyn Jones
Birmingham: Neale Sarjant Cole Hiley Berridge Tirebuck