Adoption records since 1965.

[indiapaleale]

It's interesting to read the different points of view regarding adoptees trying to find their birth parents.

I was an unmarried mother in the 50's and spent several months in a home for unmarried mothers where the babies where adopted after being cared for by their mothers for 6 weeks - although my son wasn't adopted - different story.

The babies were always picked up on a Sunday afternoon....after their Mom...usually a girl of 17-18-19 had bathed them and dressed them in their brand new clothes that were bought especially for the occasion.

After the baby was taken away by the Matron - to be given to the new parents - we were all locked in the Day Room so that we would not see who took the little one away.
Sunday tea was served....with a terrible pall over the place.....and later on the sobbing could be heard from the Mom as she lay in the bed and held the baby blanket that had been her child's.

Most of the girls had no options. No skills. No family that would take in a child.
In that respect, the 1800 were kinder because illegitimate children were taken into the family home.

I am trying to write a book...both humorous and sad...about my experiences at St. Martins...which were both some of the happiest and saddest times of my life.

If I had an adopted child, I would be more than willing to help find the birth parents.. I would be happy to search.

My thoughts,
Indi

[Phil32]

Hi all,

As the poster of the original question, I would like to thank all repliers for their knowledgable help. However, I am slightly concerned to say the least, regarding one posters replies!

I am concerned because my original question regarded the location of publically available adoption indexes. However, there seems to be a reply post from "cloggers child" regarding unethical & privacy aspects to contacting persons inside an adoption, presumably by a 3rd party, & an attempt to be made to gain pre adoption birth information! I too totally agree with the unethical privacy aspects in such a situation, but I am trying to establish exactly where a request for such advice has been posted to do so, & resulting in such a reply?

I would also like to add another concern about a subsequent post by this same person, regarding how they work with this sort of thing & how distraught they would feel if they had adopted a child, & this child later wished to contact their natural birth parents! I just feel that with such a strong bias, then perhaps this type of work is not best suited to you.

Overall, I believe there must be real benefits to be made by those adopted that wish to contact their natural birth parents, or discover their birth details, such as medical history, & perhaps other brothers & sisters.

I would like to thank again those that have helped with my original question, & also the others for sensible replies to the off topic comments made.

Many thanks.

Phil32.

[cloggers child]

As the originator of this subject seems to know all he needs to know.  No point of anyone putting anything here because it simply gets abuse for speaking the truth.

As for him calling my integrity and qualifications into disrepute that matter is offensive.

As for not knowing anything but basic knowledge of research that  is a total nonsense and can be proven.

 I rely on  research which means I physically go to the place where the documents are held rather than use second hand versions.

[Phil32]

I still fail to understand what prompted you to post such an accusational OFF TOPIC reply to my original legitimate post?

I hardly find this professional, & a totally unexpected response from someone in such an alleged position!

May I suggest that before posting such replies in the future, you read the FULL question first, & also have a slight knowledge of the subject & Publically available material with regards to family history.

[bedfordshire boy]

Phil

I know nothing about the mechanics of adoption and tracing birth parents, but I am sure from having read numerous heart warming and heart rending accounts that it is a process that must be handled with the utmost tact and discretion.

Whilst your original post was merely asking about procedures it is fairly clear from your posting history that you are  trying to find birth information on someone who was aged 18 in 1984 and was living in Cambridge - all bar two of your posts seem to be on the subject of this person and his parents.

We do not know your reasons for wanting this information, and do not know what you intend to do with it. As such I can understand why someone with first hand experience of dealing with the traumas caused by insensitive contact with birth parents should have seen red flags waving frantically.

Other mailing lists would have given you short shrift if they thought you were trying to find a living person, and would have been far harder on you than  cloggers child has been - if indeed he has been hard on you at all. His warning in his first response was general and I didn't read it as being squarely directed at you. More a general warning to a general query.

But this is really a site for tracing dead ancestors, not one for tracing living people, however pure the motive.

Just my two penn'orth

Regards

David

[Dancing Master]

New here but on reading through the boards I see there is a copy of the legal documents issued by the Government on this matter already posted by Migky

 Lancshire Board - Adoption Advice. Please  Nessie56 6 113 Yesterday at 20:18:18
by Nessie56