Any Don't Want To Knows In Your Family?

[ambers]

Oh Kath,

I really feel for you but it was a pity that she didn't consider the others around the table might have been interested.

Possibly she is a little jealous of your talent with the PC (can she use one), and herself not being in the limelight.

Even before I was into this fantastic hobby?. had anyone shown me pictures of past rellie's I would have been interested.
I have only just seen  pictures of my grandmother and ggrandmother and three of her children but am not sure which of the three ladies she is   I quickly passed them on to my only living rellie (mum's sister) but there wasn't the happiness I expected. It suprised me as she was six months old when her mum died, and had never seen her grandmother....but as she said she had lived without family knowledge for years  My mum would have been over the moon at what I have found...some of it is really interesting and she would have been so proud to boot.

So you keep happily digging .....all your Friends on here will be happy to hear of your finds.

I think by this cousins attitude there is more to it than not being interested.

Big hugs ...Ambers

[Ecneps]

Sorry to hear that Kath,

Keep up your own good work and enjoy it, and it is a good feeling when you share that information with a willing listener, but it doesn't always happen, there'll always be the ones who aren't interested.

You get used to seeing that glazed look..........

Barbara

[KathMc]

Thanks Barbara and Ambers. I do get used to the glazed look, it was the attack that shocked and saddened me. Her father would have loved all this stuff, so I was a bit surprised, but I do have a large family and a couple who are actually interested. I hold on to that. 

Kath

[Lloydy]

My Mum certainly "doesn't want to know"   I can't even discuss her family history without her grimacing.  I'm not sure what she thinks I'm going to discover, but I think the main reason behind her negativity is the fact that her father was an alcoholic so when she was growing up with her 9 siblings I should imagine life was dreadful.

I'm not concentrating on my grandad, and am more interested in the generations further back, but I still can't get her to show any interest at all.  I have carried on with my maternal family tree but have decided not to tell Mum anything

There is, however, some good news...........my Dad loves to see what I've discovered about his lot!!  Whenever he calls round he always says "Show me the latest additions to my tree"!!!!!!!!!!

[rancegal]

     In our hall we have a photo of a group of adults with a young girl in front of them. People seeing it for the first time think that it's my daughter; except that it was actually taken outside Buckingham Palace during WW2 when my F-I-L received his Distinguished Service medal from GeorgeVI ! So who was the girl?
   All we know is that she was the natural daughter of  (possibly) F-I-L or more likely, one of his siblings, and she was adopted by a distant connection. Discreet enquiries have got us nowhere.  But my daughter was the image of that girl in the photo!
   
  My F-I-L's oldest sister knew who this girl was, but she would never ever say, and took the secret to her grave.
   I think sometimes people are fearful of what you might discover. Once these secrets are uncovered, it shakes the foundations of people's security

[KathMc]

   I think sometimes people are fearful of what you might discover. Once these secrets are uncovered, it shakes the foundations of people's security

I would definitely agree with that. One of my uncles used to be very interested in genealogy, in the 60s, but then in the 90s a family secret regarding his father and an illegitimate child surfaced (still all hush hush) and all talk of genealogy ended. I think my mom is indifferent because she never really had a relationship with her dad. It's probably hard to open up about it and show interest when she never had much from him during her life. And I have a SIL who is very nasty every time I bring the subject up (my brother is one of the few extrememely interested) she is very negative. She was adopted and I think it is hard for her.

Kath

[Simplex4wd]

Quote from: KathMc

"She was adopted and I think it is hard for her."

I find that very sad, I'm adopted and the "official" family historian for my adopted family (possibly because no one else has the time  )
The degree of interest varies but my cousin (eldest relative) is very keen to see what my latest information/scandle is.

Tim

[drodgers34]

Some people do seem to have a strong anti-reaction.

I think its either an issue with death or that they believe more strongly than you do in heredity.

eg id I have murdereres or something as ancestors it means I myself am somehow tainted.

I'm not a 'people' person myself so I'm not as intersted in relatives er se but I try to describe it to people as a 'puzzle' to be solved which is different in that it was created by chance rather than an author.

[Mrs Doc]

Just reading this post I think it's such a shame rellies get nasty or show disdain because there's nothing they can do to change the past and whether they love it or hate it it's always gonna be there. I gave some family details to the oldest lady left in my family (76) and she thought it was wonderful. Mind you, I haven't found any skeletons yet! The thing is not to let them get to you, it's your hobby and you can enjoy it without them.
Mrs Doc