Give me access to your tree!!

[Simon G.]

but unfortunately there are a grabbing minority out there who want everything, dont say 'thanks', and give nothing.

Indeed, and that is the problem.  I can count on one hand the number of people I've shared information with who've actually thanked me for it...no, instead the rest of the researchers in the world are taken for granted as if the people you've sent the information too have a god-given right to it.  It's people who do just that who take all the pleasure out of contacting others and sharing your findings...and being treated like we don't matter takes away all the incentive to ever share information.  Sadly all it seems to be with some people is getting what they can, and they vanishing like a phantom into the night.
This week a few people went to thank me for my research and tell me how much of a good job they think I'm doing in my one-name study.  I can't describe how that makes one feel to know that I'm appreciated for all the time and work I've put in.  It makes everything in this hobby worthwhile when those you share information with use those two little words, and if more people did that I don't think anyone would complain at all about how their research is used.

[Lydart]

I suppose any info we find about our families in the past, also belongs to someone else as a descendent of that same family ... but it is so nice when they say a simple thank you, and then you can get together, and work together ... and make friends, as well as being distant relatives ... thats what its all about !

[trish251]

Indeed, and that is the problem.  I can count on one hand the number of people I've shared information with who've actually thanked me for it...no, instead the rest of the researchers in the world are taken for granted as if the people you've sent the information too have a god-given right to it.

Hi Simon

I find that so disappointing - I don't have my family on the net, but I have found a few cousins through chat boards and their postings on the net (not GR) Only once have I been disappointed with the contact  - I asked where her information came from & noted that what she had of my family was incorrect (I foolishly gave the correct information) & never heard from her again!

But a couple of days ago via a VERY distant cousin in law I had contact with a 4th cousin - yet again living on a different continent to me - but we are having a ball exchanging information - when it works - fabulous!

Trish

[Simon G.]

I do find it very disappointing that the times I've been thanked and treated as more than simply a means to an end are the notable exceptions to the norm for me.  It shouldn't be that way really...we're meant to all be here helping each other and being civil.  I was brought up to believe that civility costs nothing...and that there are sections of society that seem unable to use words such as "please" and "thank you" doesn't really sit well with me.  Unfortunately such is the world today though.

[JeannieR]

Hi Guys......

My experience of GR is mixed........

I was contacted by someone who definitely had the correct info, about one branch of the family. I did try to stall them, desperately wanting new info about my great grandparents etc....

In the end, I released my tree....which had taken years to do, cost me a lot of money in certificates, and travel. Their tree was released to me, and there was NO ONE on it I could relate to AT ALL........I honestly think they were professional genealogists, working for a relative, who took my well researched, and costly, family tree, and charged for it! I was back to the 1740's with this branch............

On the other hand ! Through GR, I am now in contact with my grandmothers, siblings children , and grandchildren, and even great grandchildren. I never  thought it would be possible. The family all lost touch with each other, during the blitz on Liverpool.
My grandmother was living in Leeds. It is WONDERFUL.

However.......Without wonderful ROOTSCHAT......I would never have even found the family at all, to put on GR......when I joined this site, I only had the address in Liverpool, where my mother was born in 1917.....

Thanks to ROOTSCHAT, and nobody else....I have a lovely extended family.... I can even lay claim to be related to  Liverpool Annie, distantly, but it is there.......

Just this week, I have been contacted by a direct rellie, even lives in the same town....but I am taking it very carefully. I will release my tree when I am ready.....

Regards to all...

JeannieR

[ludovica]

I always reply to such requests that my tree is private. I am not a paid-up member so I cannot access other trees, (or make initial contacts) and see no reason to display mine either, although I am happy to answer enquiries and send "down charts" generated by my software.
 I made the mistake of opening my tree to someone who then copied all my tree to their own, despite it being 99% irrelevant to her. Her copies of my research were misspelled and did not conceal the details of living people.
 Even if I was a full member, I would still keep my tree private. As I said, I am happy to share information with people who actually message me.
 I have over 14000 entries on my tree so I am never short of people making "1st contact".. up to 20 a day. With such a large db it seems good politics to be sparing with what I have. I cannot ask permission from so many people so I have to keep it discreet