Ok, so I know this post is several years old, but I have been battling with the same family myself and think I have solved it.
Jane did indeed marry Richard Bolitho in 1835, and they had two children (William Henry Paul - 1836, Harriett Jane - 1838) before the 1841 census. In the census, Richard (a tallow candle salesman who supplied the Cornish mines) can be found away from home, whilst Jane and the two children were with her parents in Redruth. It all comes down to an Enumerators error: She and the children were registered under the surname Paul rather than Bolitho. Richard is again away from home in the 1851, still selling his candles, whilst Jane is at home with the growing family (two further children at this stage). Richard's death is registered in Redruth district in 1854, and in 1861 Jane is recorded as a widow. Jane is still alive in Redruth in 1871, with two of her sons (Joseph and Thomas Henry) living with her.
Janes death is registered in Redruth in 1874.
Hopefully you have managed to resolve this in the intervening years!