it is MY family tree!!!!!

[ozlady]

I just wish I had someone to share with, or share with me! I am the only one in the family who's interested.

[MarieC]

At the moment, me too, Ozlady!  But I live in hope (foolish optimist??  )

MarieC

[ozlady]

I sent a heap of stuff to a cousin in UK, she was more interested in her father's line than her mother's "becuse I'd already done so much". I was hoping that as she was in the UK ahe could lend a hand.

[sarra]

I've been very naive in the past. Giving access to a person on GR only to find part of it was listed on another site - without my permission. So I emailed this person asking them to remove the information and living people they had taken from my tree. I got a reply which was not very nice. If I felt the need to complain - take it up with Ancestry also do not contact me again. I have noticed they have removed the Living people but left the deceased ones. Oh well  that's a lesson I have learned. I won't be so trusting again. Would love to find genuine people to receive & share information with. I've had quite a few people who do not even have the courtesy to reply to my email.
It's very off putting - makes you want to give up at times.
Sarra

[Pinetree]

Sarra,

I have not used GR but I have met a couple of "cousins" and others sharing common interests on Rootschat and they've all been great!  Friendly, helpful and genuinely interested in sharing information.

So it's another thumbs up to Rootschat 

Pinetree

[behindthefrogs]

I run a spread sheet of all my contacts.  Initially this was so that I knew what I had sent them so that I could update them.  However because of the problems discussed on this thread I found it necessary to background colour their names.

There are 132 people on the sheet.  35 of these are coded yellow because they didn't bother to reply to a request or acknowledge something that I have sent them.  I accept that some of these may be due to an error on my or their part.   Six are coded red because they have misused information that I have made available to them in the ways discussed on this thread.  The rest are coded green because they are very helpful and communicative even though in some cases they are relative beginners and have little to contribute.

What I have discovered is that on initial contact information should be drip fed rather than handed over in bulk.  For this reason I only put my direct line on GR plus those people for whom I am specifically searching for basic information.

David

[PaulaToo]

With you there, behindthefrogs.
In any case I only put the direct line up. It's a safety precaution I might want to print the darned thing. In the beginning I put everyone I could find on, by the time I printed out a tree the size of a bedspread I realised I was being a little over enthusiastic.
I do track down whole families, but I keep their records in a folder and not on my trees. Then if anyone contacts me, I drip feed until I they have earned my trust.

[Springbok]

In only 3yrs. on GR (and starting to research in earnest) I have stuck to the "drip feed " principle.

Consequently I have gone from nil to  59 genuine Contacts and access to 34 Trees.

The rest have given me snippets of helpful info. of one sort or another  and  some, we have e-mail contact and have exchanged files and hard copy.

One gentleman recently sent some notes he found in a local history book, with a note for another GR member which I passed on.  So satisfying.

Very Little of this has been added to GR and I only ever put others descendants in as far as rellies circa 1900.  This is for other newbie and younger  researchers who may have hit a brick wall.

No I am not ultra possessive about "MY Tree"  just careful.

It's difficult to be "possessive" when altogether I have now in my personal files, somewhere in the region of  a couple of 1000 souls and have met so many interesting "live" distant relatives on the way

Spring

[wheeldon]

I can't believe you have a 'naughty book'  - Behindthefrogs.  Although, I don't blame you.

It's difficult to understand some people.  If a distant rellie gave me access to their tree, I would like to discuss their findings, cross reference with mine etc.  I wouldn't dream of putting their living rellies onto my tree or put on someone who wasn't related to my family. 

A contact of mine didn't just copy ancestors onto their tree but also a part of my family, which have no relation at all.

It's just name and date gathering.

Not good sport