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Messages - microsunflower

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London & Middlesex Completed Lookup Requests / Re: Stillbirths
« on: Monday 24 August 09 15:04 BST (UK)  »
Thank you Valda for the information about babies being buried with an adult to 'look after them' and being moved to consecrated ground.   I have thought about trying to trace her and would like to thank Joanna for her link site information.  My courage fails me at present in case I find her with someone I knew locally and would feel disturbed to think she was buried with.

My next door neighbour at the time who was an elderly Catholic lady, told me that God takes stillborn children to be angels because they have been completely untouched by sin or hate, etc.   I am not religious but it's a lovely thought that another mother reading this post might take comfort from.

Sorry, don't want to turn this into some sort of counselling site.  I posted originally for genealogy reasons.  Thanks again everyone who has been so kind.

Barbara

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London & Middlesex Completed Lookup Requests / Re: Stillbirths
« on: Wednesday 18 March 09 11:20 GMT (UK)  »
Hallo,

I have just registered so this is my first post.  I saw Stillbirths and looked because I had a stillborn baby in 1962. 

At that time, and until fairly recently I believe, stillborn children were buried in unmarked graves.  This was because the church said they had not lead a separate life.  (Not sure how this is reconciled with its attitude to abortion).  I wasn't well enough to attend the burial but it was done by my husband and an undertaker in unconsecrated ground in my Parish churchyard.  There was no clergyman present.  When my local vicar called to see me a few weeks later, as a confirmed member of the Church of England I felt let down and said so.  He said, not to worry, the baby wouldn't be where she had been left.  Apparently it was the practice to move the child when the next funeral took place and to bury the child in that grave.  I was horrified and haven't been to church since.  I would have liked to know in which grave she was buried.  As my Vicar had been away on holiday at the time he didn't know where she was and I haven't found her since.

I only tell this story because if anyone is searching for the grave of a stillborn child they probably won't find one.  Didn't mean to depress anyone, only to save them time.

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