Show Posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.


Messages - hardrada

Pages: [1] 2
1
Northamptonshire / Re: N0RTHAMPTON - Home for illegitimate babies
« on: Tuesday 21 July 15 23:02 BST (UK)  »
Dear Colette,

No problem at all.  If you would rather communicate privately then perhaps we could use the Personal Messages on the Forum? 

The court would be unlikely, on the basis of a phone call, to send you the full original paperwork.  In fact they may not hold it.  The website adoptionsearchreunion has information on where the records might be (everything depends upon how your mother was adopted, through what agency if any and so on) and also how you, as the child of an adopted child, might go about obtaining access to these records (especially the original full birth certificate, which will have your grandmother's name on it).

For instance, if she was adopted through the National Adoption Society, then you would have to contact Brent Council, (the person to contact and her email are on the adoptionsearchreunion website) because the NAS no longer exists and all of their records are held at Brent.  (This I know because my son was adopted through this agency.)

Very possibly your grandmother had little or no choice about giving up her daughter for adoption.  There was little or no state support for unmarried mothers and many parents wanted (as in my case) nothing to do with their grandson.  His existence equalled shame, shame that I had brought on them.

The age of the mothers usually ranged from mid-teens (15-16) to mid-twenties.  There would occasionally have been younger girls, of course, and so too women in their later twenties, perhaps even early thirties.  But the majority of unmarried mothers-to-be were between 17-23, I would guess, by the 1960s at any rate.

Best regards,

Anne


2
Northamptonshire / Re: N0RTHAMPTON - Home for illegitimate babies
« on: Tuesday 21 July 15 22:10 BST (UK)  »
Dear ColetteBeanz,

I'm afraid that I was in Elmleigh on Harlestone Road in 1969, so would not have met a woman named Daryl (are you certain of the spelling?  Daryl is usually a male name) Waters in 1964. 

You say that you have been unable to find your grandparent(s).  Did your mother get her original, full, birth certificate?  Or even the original short certificate?  Unfortunately I'm unsure about what access, if any, to the original birth/adoption records the children of an adopted parent are permitted. 

Are you even sure of the birth year/place of your mother?  I think that (but cannot swear to) on adoption the new, short birth certificate granted the adoptive parents has, as the place of birth, the location of the adoption order, usually where the court in their own district is situated. 

In my son's case, for instance, I know that the adoption was formalised in Guildford Surrey in April 1970 (I still have the original of the adoption order sent to me by the court).  So I should think that a new "birth" certificate was issued on or around that date giving Surrey as his birth county and the town in which his new parents lived as his birthplace.   (I gather that only a short form certificate is issued and that has only the most basic of details: name, date of birth, town and county of birth.)

If - IF - you wish for some help in trying to find your grandmother and you have access to her name/your mother's original birth name and the year +/- 2, I would be happy to see if I could find her for you in the GRO indexes (I have subs to two very well known genealogical websites, so it is no trouble or expense). 

I'm sorry that you have not been able to find your grandmother so far.

Best regards,

Anne (Reeves)

3
Northamptonshire / Re: N0RTHAMPTON - Home for illegitimate babies
« on: Friday 08 May 15 18:22 BST (UK)  »
First let me thank you for your kind thoughts and comments.  And for your additional memories of Elmleigh.  As they say, every little helps.

I plugged Lady Susan Glover into Google and discovered that she had been, after the closing of Elmleigh and the cessation of the National Adoption Society, a director of four businesses.  When she died (1994-1995) she left well over two million pounds.  Clearly an astute businesswoman. 

It does raise a question about Elmleigh and its status as profit or non-profit given that everything had to be paid for by the single mothers (or whoever paid for those with outside support).  That along with her owning and running Elmleigh as a mother and baby home whilst at the same time being chair of the NAS raises - in my mind at least - ethical issues.

My best regards,

Anne   


4
Northamptonshire / Re: N0RTHAMPTON - Home for illegitimate babies
« on: Tuesday 05 May 15 17:40 BST (UK)  »
Dear James Mac,

Well, well.  I have just been in contact with Northamptonshire County Council and they have just informed me that Lady Glover was the Chairperson of The National Adoption Society at the time (certainly in 1969 when I was there, possibly over the 1960s and early 1970s).  Thus the very strong connection of Elmleigh to the NAS and very real, but not advertised (among expectant mothers, anyway) purpose of the home.  All about Adoption.

Best regards,

Anne


5
Northamptonshire / Re: N0RTHAMPTON - Home for illegitimate babies
« on: Tuesday 05 May 15 00:06 BST (UK)  »
Dear James Mac,

Thank you again for bothering to recall more details.  The second woman sounds to have been Mrs Clarke and she gave every appearance of being a close friend of Lady Glover as well as from the upper middle classes if not the petty gentry. 

The NAS was involved because they managed the adoption side of things - at least they did my son's.  So far as I'm aware, paying to adopt (buying babies) was strictly illegal.  But I don't doubt that those with the means made donations to the home or others like it.

Your having to pay for your lunches doesn't surprise me.  Everything connected to being in the house had to be paid for, the doctor's fee for examining the baby plus any other related costs. 

Lady Glover and her friends clearly had a network of acquaintances and friends who were willing to take in poorer young pregnant women and give them work, pay that all important NI contribution, and pay wages.  Every penny of those wages had to be saved to help pay for the handful of days that I spent within the home before giving birth and the fortnight afterwards.  Those savings joined all of the maternity benefits (if I recall right there was a lump sum and a weekly/monthly amount for about three months) in paying the bill. 

To be honest and fair, Lady Glover and Mrs Clarke knew of my financial situation and when I had to leave a job, go into hospital for observation and bed rest, and then go back to the home for a few days (until they found me a less physically onerous job) they put me up in some kind of chalet or holiday home that was near the house (I think).  For that I did not have to pay (but what I did for food I don't remember).  Then Lady Glover's daughter and family gave me a job as cook in their apartment in London for about three weeks.  It was an easy job with plenty of time for rest. 

Of course, I still had to leave my son behind and that was the aim of the place.

You have really helped and I thank you for it. 

Anne

6
Northamptonshire / Re: N0RTHAMPTON - Home for illegitimate babies
« on: Saturday 02 May 15 19:17 BST (UK)  »
Hello James Mac,

Thank you for confirming my perception of Elmleigh's true purpose.  Mind you, at the time I didn't understand that the aim was providing babies for adoption.  In my naivety, I assumed that it was there to help single mothers have a place to stay, give birth and make the decision whether to place for adoption or not.  Only on looking back over these past few years have I come to realise that Elmleigh and its owners had no interest in helping the mothers keep their babies.  Therefore, there was no advice on where to go for help (social services for those of us who were low income, working class young women).  Of course, there might not have been any.  But we ought to have had the opportunity to discuss the possibilities or impossibilities with people at social services.

Elmleigh was affiliated with the National Adoption Society, but certainly didn't belong to NAS.

As I only ever met and spoke with two women - including Lady Glover (thank you for reminding me of her name) - I had no idea that there were three in ownership.

The longest I could afford to stay at Elmleigh with my son was fourteen days.  Prior to his birth I spent no more than a week in total in the house, again because every day-night there carried a fee. I arrived with two shillings (as a florin piece) and left with no more than that, after I had bought my train ticket. 

My feelings towards Elmleigh are completely coloured by the fact of having to leave my son behind.  It was a nice enough place and the women who ran it treated me kindly (but then, I didn't choose to keep my baby).  And, of course, I paid my bill.

7
Northamptonshire / Re: N0RTHAMPTON - Home for illegitimate babies
« on: Monday 20 April 15 18:05 BST (UK)  »
Dear All Who Reach These Pages,

Thank you for reminding me which mother and baby home I went to.  I couldn't remember the name (blotted it out?).  It was the private one affiliated with the National Adoption Society and run by two middle aged women who both came from very moneyed backgrounds.  I noticed that one of the messages here spoke about the young women in this home (Elmleigh on Harlestone Rd.) coming from wealthy families.  And some certainly did.  But others like me most definitely did not. 
Not that my parents were any more willing to accept my pregnancy or their first grandchild than those among the richer levels of society.

My reason for going to Elmleigh was two-fold: I was and am an atheist and the only other mother and baby homes I knew about were Christian; and at Elmleigh I had a choice of how long (up to six weeks) I could stay, caring for my baby.  Of course that choice was, in my case, severely limited by the cost, every day in the home adding to the total which had to be paid.

To allow me to pay for my time there, the expenses related to my baby's time there and the pre-adoption medical tests, the two women found me living-in work away from the home.  In all I had three jobs.  All three employers had to contribute to the N.I. to ensure that I got the maternity benefit because those monies also all went towards paying the bill.  It took every penny I earned together with the whole of the maternity benefits to pay that bill. 

The women who ran the place were very considerate, but when I asked them how I might manage to be able to keep my son, given that my parents had refused to help, they had no response beyond my needing to do what was right for my child.  Providing healthy children for adoption was, at root, the reason for their existence.  Providing low income mothers with advice on how to keep their children was not their real goal.

I was there in 1969 and my son was placed for adoption - in Guildford, Surrey. 


8
Staffordshire Lookup Requests / Re: A Walsall marriage
« on: Thursday 22 November 12 20:20 GMT (UK)  »
Hello Carole,

Unfortunately I live several thousands of miles away in Arizona so cannot or otherwise I would have.  Indeed were I living anywhere in England still, I 'd have made the journey!  But thanks anyway - you weren't to know.

Regards,
Anne

9
Staffordshire Lookup Requests / A Walsall marriage
« on: Thursday 22 November 12 20:00 GMT (UK)  »
Dear Rootschatters,

Does anyone have access to Walsall Marriage Records; and if so, would they mind looking up one for me? 

The wedding in question took place on the 27th February, 1838 at St Matthew, Walsall between Thomas Harper and Nancy Partridge.  My need is to know the name of Thomas's father (particularly; Nancy's would also be helpful, but is much less important).  This is for elimination purposes not because this Thomas and Nancy are in my family (they are not), but because the names and ages and place of birth and dwelling of this couple all too neatly coincide with that of the couple who are my great x three grandparents. 

Once I know the name of the father of this Thomas Harper, then I can move forward one way or another with the man I think may well have been my ancestor's parent: remove him from or keep him where he is on the tree.

I have contacted Walsall registry office with the query, but have so far had no response and may never because I am not buying the certificate. 

If anyone can assist me, I should be most grateful.

Thank you for reading.

Best regards,

Anne

Pages: [1] 2