No lights at all could be a power supply issue coupled with a flat battery.
An electrical test meter connected to the terminals that plug into thee Laptop will show if power is available.
At 13 years old even spending £15-£25 on a new power supply would still not guarantee that the Laptop would work.
It is probably time to buy a new Laptop.
Do destroy the hard drive and recycle the remainder of the Laptop when it come to disposal time.
Miraculously, the laptop switched on.
However there are several issues.
1. The battery doesn't seem to be charging, there is a red cross across the icon.
2. It is telling me that the Microsoft package is not genuine.
3. It tells me Windows has crashed.
4. My most reliable mouse has stopped working.
😔😔.
I still have a Windows 3.1 laptop in the loft which I haven't used for a long time but kept because I still had an old software package used occasionally - and then because I keep forgetting to take it to the recycling. The main battery has long given up the ghost but it did still work on mains power last time I tried so that wasn't a concern.
As others have suggested, resetting the date and time might fix the Windows problems. Most CMOS batteries are replaceable button batteries and doing that would retain the date settings.
Best way of destroying a hard drive is to hit it several times with a sledgehammer - but wear PPE, especially eye protection.