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I've had exactly the same problem: mine was a DOM in 1803, between William Heard, nee 1781, and Mary Jones ( both nee Ware), at St. Ethelburga's, Bishopsgate, both said to be OTParish. I reluctantly accepted it, after looking on the map and seeing it was a f. easy run-in. My direct ancestor is William Heard, nee Ware 1781, of Richard and Mary (I think). He died in Ware 1832 (DOBur 24/12/32), age 54, and is said to be near his wife, Mary (DOBur 1833, age 51, but also, confusingly, near his 'sister' Mary (DOBur 1831, age 70). This must surely be his mother, Mary. Misinformation (like William Heard, nee 1781, not being down as 'deceased', on his daughter's Marriage Certif. in 1848, has caused much uncertainty. I would be most grateful, if anyone also interested in this line (he was a bargeman), could tell me who his father was, for sure, as so many Wm Heards, were born about the same time as him.
dorisi