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General => The Common Room => The Lighter Side => Topic started by: mrs.tenacious on Sunday 20 February 11 20:17 GMT (UK)
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Only Rootschatters will know how I feel tonight......
Spent the afternoon at a family gathering to celebrate my parents' Diamond Wedding Anniversary - the first time all of us had got together in one place since their 50th 10 years ago. A truly lovely afternoon, and a fantastic family photo to boot.
Anyway, 10 minutes before we had to leave, and acknowledging my role as the "family historian", my Mum mentions THE OLD PHOTOS BOX UPSTAIRS.
So off I run, find it, have the opportunity to "skim" through the top of stuff I have NEVER seen before. Grabbed a totally stunning photo of my grandfather aged about 18, the full wedding photo of my paternal grandparents (previously had the first, torn headshot), and also my maternal grandparents.
I caught a very quick glimpse of the rest of the "treasure". I don't think I will be able to get back down to my parents for about a month.
And that box will be sitting there, just quietly waiting for me. ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
Aaargh!!!!
Mrs. T.
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Oh but the joy of anticipation!
Just think what you have to look forward to the next time you visit. Just make sure you go equipped with notebook, pen, scanner...swag bag ;) ;)
Lucky you. I hope you really enjoy it.
Jen :) :)
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Oh but the joy of anticipation!
Just make sure you go equipped with notebook, pen, scanner...swag bag ;) ;)
At the moment, Jen, the joy of anticipation is being offset by the chewing of the fingernails :P, but thank you for that, I will enjoy.
Mum & Dad don't have a computer, and I don't have a laptop, so it will mean a long but enjoyable day with a pencil and reams of paper!
Mrs. T.
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You must have more patience than me- I would have asked to borrow the box so I could scan the photos ;)
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And I'd have picked it up and run..... ;D ;D ;D
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Don't think for one minute that I wasn't tempted..........................
But my Dad was saying things like "Oh, I've been looking for that/those for a while" , and my Mum was saying "I really need to sort these out properly"
At least they agreed to look through them and annotate where annotations were missing, and agreed it would be lovely for me to spend the day sorting through them.
The wonderful photo of my grandfather: "can I take this for scanning, Dad?"
"Of course, as long as I get it back - although I don't think I'll need to hang on to it for much longer" - it's been in that box for at least 20 years, and my Dad is 83. ;D ;D ;D
Bless 'em.
Mrs T.
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I hope your parents are sensible and that you stressed to your parents how they mustn't 'do' anything with the box - or any other box until you have seen it, documented it, photographed it etc. My dad is 89 - still alive and my mum was the hoarder - thank you mum!! After she died, in 2004 he 'helpfully' threw out things that I knew were there that mum had kept - I wasn't allowed to take them when she was alive. Dad didn't see the point of them so lots of history, not just of ours but of some church history went out AAARRRGGGHHH. Now that Dad is a tad confused, I have brought things away to our house and only take them back either when he asks for them or they come up in conversation. I also scanned his old RAF photos before I took them back just in case he looked at them then binned them! I know we'll be old one day but we genealogists know what treasure there is in them there cupboards :)
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What you have to do is talk and talk and talk, whilst they can still remember. I have just written to my aunt in Australia, who is the only surviving member of my dad's generation. Only she can answer some of the tricky questions which, had I only bothered to take note, were actually answered by my nan a very long time ago!
My partner's mum is almost ninety and must have so many answers stored up in her mind but sadly, she can no longer get at that bit of her memory.
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I remember at the funeral of my Auntie, aged 90, the youngest surviving child of twelve, her daughter brought out a box of old photographs.We eagerly swooped and several were borrowed.
I suggested that we make a list of who had what so if for example I had a photo I could copy it for whoever wanted copies and vice-versa. What I really thought may happen did, ie some were never returned to my cousin including Auntie`s wedding photo.Had we listed them there would have been some chance at least they would have been returned .It is heartbreaking.
Most of our family photos on Dad`s side were lost in the blitz too.
I envy you and know you will treasure them and keep them safe for generations to come.Viktoria.
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I completely empathise! We have a family 'box' with probably well over 500 photos in. I have only been allowed little glances over the years and my aging aunt kept a very tight hold over it. However about a year ago, my mum managed somehow to get hold of the box and it's been at her house since. Unfortunately my mum is the youngest sibling so couldn't name many of the people at all. My aunt is the only person who could do it and asking her would prompt her to take the photographs back (which my mum was determined she couldn't do!). To cut a long story short, I got my mum and aunt together at Christmas and we went through the pictures. I recorded the conversations we had on my laptop as I scanned the images. I now have scanned copies of about 200 relatives with names and stories attached. The photos are still with my mum apart from a few that my aunt took back.
Kim
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I forgot to say that on the other side of my family, we have no photos at all pre 1950s as the house next door to my granddad's received a direct hit during the blitz, in Rotherhithe. :(
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Sadly, we have a similar situation with photos from my husband's side of the family. In 1963, his parents were dairy farmers on the mid north coast of NSW, when they were flooded ... it was the occasion which prompted Slim Dusty to write his song "When The Rain Tumbled Down In July".
Very very few family photographs survived; - most were washed out into the Pacific, and many of those which remained were badly water-damaged. Up to a point, maybe there's something to be said for storing photos in the roof space?
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Mum & Dad don't have a computer, and I don't have a laptop, so it will mean a long but enjoyable day with a pencil and reams of paper!
Many of the modern printer/scanner/copiers will act as stand-alone copiers (without computer). I would be tempted to invest in one - it will save you hours of time and at least you will have some record of the images :)
What a great treat for you when you can get back!!
Linda
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Do you have a camera? Maybe you could photograph some of the items?
Kooky
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if i were you i would beg borrow mmmn maybe not steal a laptop to make sure you get these treasures.
All i ever asked my stepmum for, was years of paperwork postcards and photos.she died in 2009
and the nephew in charge of her affairs knew how much they meant to me.he informed me he had taken them to the tip [after i had found out he was stealing money from what he thought was her bankcard .it was mine]
do not risk losing yours
sylvia
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Thanks everyone for the replies - there are a good few suggestions here for me to consider.
My parents do understand how important these photos are, and are looking forward to my going through them all with them. For the moment they are going to sift through what they can and annotate, and in a lot of cases that will reduce the eventual workload. I don't have any worries about gaining access to them, and I know they'll be left to all us children eventually. If I scan and record everything properly at this stage, I know there won't be any problems sharing them with my siblings when the time comes.
But your ideas will make me think about the best and most efficient way to record these treasures. It's got to be done properly.
Mrs. T.
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thanks for sharing this. I am getting a warm glow of anticipatory excitement on your behalf....... ;)
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Please let us know what happens!
Kooky
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I borrowed my parents' stack of photos and documents to scan them, they know they're in safe hands because I'm a hoarder like they are. I have a huge bag full of folders and albums and in return I've bought some nice boxes for them to be stored in when I give them back. There's only me and my brother so no danger of the collection being split up. The one thing I couldn't borrow was an enormous 4x3 portrait of my great-great grandmother, I'm just going to have to photograph that.
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Thats one big portrait Lal!!!
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My great aunt Who is in her 80s , not only gave the family photos she had to my mum as her daughter has no interest andhad told her to throw them out . BUT annotated them as well . I have photos dating back to at least 1878 may be before. it can not be after that date as the youngest died and there are 5 girls on it the youngest looking age 5/6 .the youngest died the year before my gg grandmother and they are both buried in the same grave - my ggggrandparents lost two children and gained custody ( at the asking of the boys father) of two grandsons in two years. i can only imagine how much that photo must have meant - as from then on they get rather fond of the camera.
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My great aunt Who is in her 80s , not only gave the family photos she had to my mum as her daughter has no interest andhad told her to throw them out . BUT annotated them as well . I have photos dating back to at least 1878 may be before.
You lucky thing!
Still sitting on my hands :P :P :P
Mrs. T.
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Thats one big portrait Lal!!!
It certainly is big, so big there's nowhere to hang it at the moment! And it must have cost someone a lot of money to have done, I've a feeling my great grandmother paid for it because it was found carefully packed away in the loft of her old house. And it's still packed away even now :(
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Its so lovely to discover family photos you never knew existed.
My parents died young (64 and 58) and we never had a family photo of all four of us, parents and me and my sister. That really upset me. Then my auntie found an old film and got it developed, and there was a photo of us. To all of you with children, please get a photo of you all so you have it. It was often the case of either Mum or Dad took the photo so one of them was missing. I'm cheeky and ask strangers can you take one of us when I want a group photo.
Also when we were clearing the house out I found two photos. Took them to my auntie who said they are your great grandparents and told me all about them. She never knew these photos existed either, was so exciting.
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To all of you with children, please get a photo of you all so you have it. It was often the case of either Mum or Dad took the photo so one of them was missing.
What an important message, Traceypat, and a very poignant one for me personally. I mentioned when I posted this thread about our family gathering to celebrate my parents' 60th wedding anniversary, and how we got a great family photo, spanning three generations; my parents, their 3 (out of four)children, spouses/partners and grandchildren. My brother took the photo with a time delay setting, so he was included.
But there were a few hugely important people missing: my sister, her son, his wife and their son. They all live hundred of miles away and couldn't get there. My sister has MS, is disabled and housebound. It proved impossible to get us all there under one roof on the same day.
My Mum & Dad treasure the photo they have, but we all know there's a big gap. My brother thinks he can superimpose photos of my sister and family, so that the whole family is "complete". It would mean the world to us all if it works.
To reiterate Traceypat's sentiments: whenever you may get the opportunity for a proper family photo - grab it. :-*
Mrs. T.
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Mrs T, if the job of combining photos gets too tricky for your brother, there are always lovely people willing to give it a shot, on the Photo Restoration & Dating board ;)
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Thank you Deb D.
They will be the first people I turn to if my brother's efforts need some help.
I've been lucky enough to reap the benefits of their expertise already!
Mrs. T.
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Mrs T thanks for your post.
Can I add that when I thought we never had that picture my then boss said to me but you have the memories in your head. So very true. My mother's parents didn't have a wedding photo but remembered the day well. They married on boxing day as it saved money as they had left over ham etc. How sensible that is compared with the megabuck weddings that some have now.
But yes if you can get that photo I'd do it while you can. Or if not I'm trying to write happy memories from my childhood and since down to go with the family tree.
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Well, I can honestly say it was well worth the wait - even if it was driving me nuts!
Spent the day with my parents going through some photos and other stuff I'd never seen before. Everything is now annotated and I have a mammoth amount of things to scan. My older brother has just started to 'jump on my bandwagon' so to speak, and has realised the importance of these treasures.
He asked to borrow some photos for scanning last week, and my Mum told him he could only borrow them if he PROMISED to return them ready for my visit today ;D
Apart from photos, I now have a couple of letters written by my grandfather to my grandmother in 1933, his monogrammed silver cigarette case (which hubby has promised to clean up for me), and birthday cards sent by my grandfather to his sister from 1920-1925, and still in beautiful condition!
Best of all, I spent a lovely day with my Mum & Dad, reminiscing and sharing memories.
:) :) :) :) :)
Mrs. T.
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Oh Mrs. T. That is fantastic! I have goose bumps for you. Enjoy & I hope to see some of your new finds on the restoration board getting spiffed up.
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That's brilliant news. I think we were all holding our breath for you that nothing would happen in the meantime.
My dad who is now 89 decided he would tear some things up (unknown to me) that I had wanted for our family history collection and then one day he says ' I don't think I should have thrown those things away'. What things were those says I to dad. My next inward words were 'aarrgghh!' Since then I've removed things to our house surreptitiously and only bring them back if he asks for them.
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A great result, but what was it with my family and no notepaper to hand?
We initially got excited when we saw writing on the reverse of some of the photos, thinking they would confirm identities and dates - only to read messages from one family member to another e.g. "Have had to pop out. Father requires his dinner at 1 o'clock prompt" or "have gone to ...... and plan to be back around 6 o'clock". Made us laugh, though!
The most poignant photo was one of me, taken when I was 3 weeks old. The day my Mum was told she was pregnant with me was the same day she was diagnosed with TB. She spent 8 months in the hospital sanitorium.
When I was born I was whisked away - she wasn't allowed to hold me because of the risk of infection/all other things medical.She had an illicit hug, aided and abetted by a sympathetic nurse, when I was 2 weeks old. I went home to my Dad, brother and grandparents 3weeks after the birth, my Mum had to stay for a further 6 weeks. My godparents visited my Dad the next day and took that photo of me, and wrote a message on the back as if it were from me. Dad drove from Kent to the hospital in London soon after with the photo, so my Mum could at least have that. I'd never seen the photo before.
Looking at it 54 years later induced a moist-eyed hug. ;)
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The most poignant photo was one of me, taken when I was 3 weeks old. The day my Mum was told she was pregnant with me was the same day she was diagnosed with TB. She spent 8 months in the hospital sanitorium.
When I was born I was whisked away - she wasn't allowed to hold me because of the risk of infection/all other things medical.She had an illicit hug, aided and abetted by a sympathetic nurse, when I was 2 weeks old. I went home to my Dad, brother and grandparents 3weeks after the birth, my Mum had to stay for a further 6 weeks. My godparents visited my Dad the next day and took that photo of me, and wrote a message on the back as if it were from me. Dad drove from Kent to the hospital in London soon after with the photo, so my Mum could at least have that. I'd never seen the photo before.
Looking at it 54 years later induced a moist-eyed hug. ;)
That brought a tear to my eye too Mrs. T. :'( What a perfectly wonderful keepsake - & what a kind & generous thing for your godparents to have done.
It might be a wonderful little return keepsake to mount copy to a card & send it to the godparents on your birthday (if you're fortunate enough to still have them in your life.) :)
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A lovely idea RedMystic. Embarrassingly, I just realised the couple weren't my godparents but my Mum's cousin and her husband. The two men had the same name and I'd got a bit muddled :-[ However, my Mum's cousin is still with us, and I think I just might do what you suggested.
Thank you. :-*