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General => The Common Room => Topic started by: tn17 on Wednesday 22 August 07 02:32 BST (UK)

Title: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: tn17 on Wednesday 22 August 07 02:32 BST (UK)
Hi everybody,

In the course of my studies, using things like WWII service records, death notices in the paper and electoral rolls, I think I have tracked down living descendants of some of the branches of my tree. Do you think it's acceptable to contact these kind of relatives (who, to my knowledge, are not researching their family history)? Or is it likely to be viewed in a "breach of privacy" manner? If any Rootschatters have had expieriences with this kind of thing, I would love to hear about it.

Thanks

TN
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: Jaki on Wednesday 22 August 07 03:33 BST (UK)
Hi TN

Using a death notice of a great uncle i discovered a living descendant and contacted them. I explained who I was, how I was linked to them and what I was doing and included a basic family group sheet and asked them if they wouldn't mind filling in some blanks for me in the information I had for that family. I also sent a stamped self addressed envelope and left it up to them to respond.

I got lucky and the person responded by completing the information for me and sending me a couple of photos of my grandmother and her sisters.

You never know unless you try.

Jaki
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: casalguidi on Wednesday 22 August 07 08:49 BST (UK)
Hi TN

We were given names of living relatives by fellow researchers and, of the (I think) five contacted, all of them phoned and four invited us to visit ;D

Casalguidi :)
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: lizdb on Wednesday 22 August 07 08:54 BST (UK)
Yes - always worth trying.

My brother and I have done much the same - traced several branches of our tree down to present day via various records.
We sucessfully contacted and met up with one branch, but another failed to reply to our letter.
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: tn17 on Wednesday 22 August 07 09:21 BST (UK)
Jaki, Casalguidi, Lizdb

Great to hear about what sound like largely successful efforts - you're inspiring me to send out a few letters. I guess I was just a little paranoid that someone might feel spied upon. Still, if it bother them, I guess they just won't reply to the first letter.

TN
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: lizdb on Wednesday 22 August 07 09:33 BST (UK)
I know what you mean, but when you think about it, all the info you have gained has been from publically available records. The information is out there for absolutely anyone to see, family or not.
It is not as if you have broken in to their house and rummaged through their personal papers!

That is how I look at it anyway!
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: Jeanette H on Tuesday 28 August 07 15:33 BST (UK)
Hello To All RootsChat Members,

You will never really know if your distant relatives are researching their Family History or not.  If you feel that you want to send a letter then go ahead, its the only way to find out.

I have just posted a Message to a very similar Topic at the
following 'RootsChat' URL:
Topic:  Visiting Distant Relatives.
http://www.rootschat.com/forum/index.php/topic,252724.0.html

*  If you read [Reply: No 9] you will see what I mean. 
The whole family are now all very interested in making contact, and there are a few researchers amongst them.

The other Posts on this Topic also have wonderful stories to tell as well.

So why not give it ago.

Jeanette H.

Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: oldtimer on Tuesday 28 August 07 17:30 BST (UK)
I knew that two of my great uncles had emigrated to the US in the early 20th century. I knew the city where they had gone, and obviously the surname, which luckily wasn't too common. Using the Internet (where would we be without it!!!) I looked at the US phone books and found several people with the right surname. It also gave their addresses, so I wrote a letter explaining who I was, and asking them if they thought they were related, and sent it to five at random. Three answered - they were all relatives and thrilled to hear from me. Since then we have corresponded regularly (thanks to the Internet again!!!) and I have sent them all my research and received some wonderful old family photos from them as well as other information.

So I would say - Go for it!!!

Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: poppysmum on Tuesday 28 August 07 17:32 BST (UK)
hi

i found the address of a cousin in america from her father's obituary.  i sent her a letter and she replied with an email.  she sent me some photos of her family and i sent her a photo of her granpa as a little boy.

i was really nervous about doing it but i am glad i did now!

caroline
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: tn17 on Friday 31 August 07 08:31 BST (UK)
Thanks to everyone for your stories - I'm glad to hear that so many of you have had success contacting relatives.

I've written down the addresses of four relatives I'm going to try to contact - drafting letters now. Got my fingers crossed that things work out as well as they did for the rest of you.

TN
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: KathMc on Saturday 01 September 07 15:41 BST (UK)
Good luck and keep us posted. I have done it loads of times, and you never really know if they are researching anyway. A couple I did through a fluke and it turned out they were also researching. One man I found wasn't researching, but has had a wonderful time asking his very elderly father questions and learning loads of new things, that he happily shares with me.

Kath
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: tn17 on Thursday 06 September 07 01:41 BST (UK)
Good news!

First one got back to me today. Thrilled to receive my letter, and we just chatted on the phone for about 10 minutes. It was quite a thrill (albeit a strange one) to hear the voice of someone who, up until now, had just been a name on a tree. We've made plans to talk again soon.

Now I've got my fingers crossed on the other two.


Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: oldtimer on Thursday 06 September 07 04:24 BST (UK)
Hey! Well done! So pleased for you!

Hope it is the start of a long friendship!!  :D :D :D
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: KathMc on Thursday 06 September 07 10:46 BST (UK)
Great. I am so happy you heard back. And thanks for keeping us posted.

Kath
Title: Re: Contacting Distant non-researching relatives
Post by: casalguidi on Thursday 06 September 07 10:48 BST (UK)
Hi TN

Well done you - brilliant news :)

Casalguidi